I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Never let your siblings swipe right.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize