party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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