I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
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