Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
