M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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