And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
