I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
