the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
