well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Randomize
