we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Randomize
