Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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