I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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