i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Randomize
