Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Randomize
