So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
