Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize
