Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Randomize
