Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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