Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
