haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Randomize
