I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Randomize
