Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
