hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
i will never coherently bang her
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
