like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
