i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
Randomize