I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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