Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Randomize
