Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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