I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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