How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
