I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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