why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
Randomize