drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize