He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize
