So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
