Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
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