Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
