Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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