I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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