So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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