Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
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