i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize
