He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
I had to cum in my sink.
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