32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Randomize
