Don't you send me to vm
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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