? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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