Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize
