Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
I'm drunk at a fancy martini bar, wearing jeans, drinking cheap vodka that I brought in my purse. Got thrown out of court for using my cell phone. All in all calling Thursday a success.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
