butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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