I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
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