he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
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then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
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